The Truth

Sometimes the truth needs to be brought to light, and what better way than song?

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Instructions: How To Be Rude

Your guess is as good as mine. But according to a scientist on the internet, his translation goes from left to right:

1. Not doing the team pose is rude.

2. Executing your final attack on Godzilla before the climactic end of the battle is very rude.

3. Being awake when Santa shows up is terribly rude.

There should be a book about all the ways you could be rude, and if you are, how to stop.

*update* found it.

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Michael Jackson

1983 was the year I was born and it's the same year Michael Jackson released Billie Jean. So pretty much 1983 was the best year to be born, ever.

In honor of MJ, I give you this. Some of you, like me, were lucky enough to see this in 3D at Disneyland back in the 80's. Yes I said 3D!

If you want to see how MJ got himself into this crazy situation, click here for part 1.

On a sadder note, I will never fulfill one of my life goals to see MJ in concert. Way to go Universe, you've done it again.

Oh, and just in case you were wondering.

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Rx Bandits

It's getting closer to the new CD release date. Mandala will be in stores July 14th! In the meantime, if you're not familiar with Rx Bandits shame on you. I suggest you get familiar now.

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More Proof

More Proof that Japan is off their rockers.

What else can I say other than I need to live in Japan. Godzilla, School Girls, and soda instead of water? Where do I sign up?

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Paintings I Wish I Had (pt.2)

It's important that an art collector keep his gallery updated and fresh. These should go nicely in the gallery.

Remind me to show you the other addition to my gallery sometime.

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I Need to Know One Thing

WHO'S CAT IS THIS!?

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Informative Instructions

Life doesn't come with instructions, but lucky for us there real American heroes out there who know what they are talking about and are willing to share their gold mines of information with us. For example, babies.

Make sure this song is playing while you read all the instructions. There will be test, both written and physical.

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Miscommunication

So this is what they've been trying to tell us! It makes so much more sense now.

How very polite and nice, Dinosaurs are so misunderstood. I really think we could make the world a better place for all if we just took the time to say hi. Except terrorists. We say goodbye to them.

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The Great Debate

This will affect you and your children in the possible near future. I suggest you take this very very serious.

I don't know what's worse, ignorant parents who ignore these warnings? Or the fact that there's not enough of these lying around. Either way, something has got to be done and I believe that we are close to being on the right track but far from it.

Better take this quiz to be sure.

55%

Well it looks like I'm screwed, probably cause I don't own a gun. Anybody going to Walmart?

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Lunch Time

So this dad makes sack lunch bags for his kids each day during his lunch break.

...and of coarse let's not forget about this one.

Come on Dad, get on the ball! Where the heck is my custom art sack lunches? All I got was a prepaid meal ticket for school lunch. Selfish father, my own selfish selfish father.

You can see more of this dad's work at his site.

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T Shirts I Want (Pt. 2)

Some of the latest and greatest that you just might see in my collection.

After Hunting

Something about this shirt that makes me laugh. WHAT are they talking about!?

It's Always Midnight Somewhere

Just imagine what it would be like to walk down the grocery store aisle wearing this bad puppy. Yes, that's exactly what I mean.

Hot Chicks on Wolves

Screw "Three Wolf Moon"! This is how you get the ladies guys. All I really have to say about this one is, "HIGH FIVE!" This would go nicely with a trip to Peta.

Heroes In An Art Shell

I refer to this.

You can find all of these at threadless.com

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Love Hurts Literally

Well It's about time they made a romance movie I'd be interesting in seeing.

An instant classic, this deserves to be put in that vault the government made to keep historic documents and other stuff for future generations.

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Baby Bad Ass

This is not right, but yet it's so right.

Oh thank goodness, they are FDA Approved! Which means that all my little babies will be sporting Rock Flag and Eagle tattoos to show how proud I am of America and NASCAR.

Here is where you can find them. And by "you" I mean Sam. You know you want to buy these.

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Game Over

Maybe "Game Over" wouldn't be so bad if it was always like this one.

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Spies at Every Level

Some of you may recognize why this picture is ironically funny. As for the rest of you, I'll tell you when you're older...

...and now that you're older, I'll explain. The Asian man in the photo is Shigeru Miyamoto, the president of Nintendo. He's the guy who invented this, that, Mario and his mushroom adventures, and a whole lot more things. So why is that picture funny then? Because he's holding a PSP®go that was released this week at E3 2009 by Sony. Looks kinda curious doesn't he?

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Awards of Highest Honor

Soldier, you have been award this medal for doing nothing but sit on your butt and play Video Games for xx amount of hours of your life. HIGH FIVE!

Made by Supermandolini™ using sheer genius and a little element I like to call awesomeness. When German design firm "Be Nice" has extra energy, they head over to their playground Supermandolini™ to create t-shirts, accessories, prints, and other household items.

You can purchase this medal and others like it here.

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Thieves!

This is nothing. One time I was at Sea World California, and I had bought a huge double patty burger. Cost me like 7 bucks! I set the burger down on our outside table and went off to get some Ketchup. Two seconds later a huge seagull swoops down and yanks my double patty burger off my plate and 30 feet into the air. The thing could barely fly the burger was so big! GOSH DANGIT! Stupid effing BIRDS!! Anyways, Sea World saw it happen and they gave me a free burger. So what did I learn from this experience? The seagull may have saved Utah, but that's no reason to feel special and treat yourself to my burger!

These people know what I'm talking about.

Dude didn't even see it coming!

You can see more here. I do have to admit it is pretty funny now that a few traumatizing years have passed.

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Pimp My Ride: Pirates

What pirate wouldn't want to pick up their wenches in this bad boy?

Yes, it's a limo, and to answer your other question, yes, it does. All you pirates out there are lucky! It's on sale, and you can buy it here. Guys, please be aware that this will greatly improve your chances with every lady. Especially when worn with this. Ladies, if you see this driving down the road, don't resist. It's natural.

Product Description as found on the web site: It has 6 mega speakers and large amplifiers that will blow your socks off. The pirate ship was built on the chassis 10 years ago by a local pirate.

Now if that's not a "BUY ME NOW" product description, I don't know what is! Plus the limo has a very attractive, but protective, bumper.

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