May 15, 2009

Bears and You, What You Should Know

There are some things that naturally don't mix. Oil and water, cats and water, me and vegetables, etc. But sometimes mother nature throws a curve ball.

Bears, I'm talking about bears.

How come I was never notified that bears could be household pets!? Who wouldn't want a pet BEAR as a kid?! There is injustice in the world and it must be stopped. Every kid should know that yes, yes you can have a pet bear.

Here's the best part, you can train your bear to go and get groceries for you.

You don't even need to worry about correct change, because who's going to argue with a bear?

*Update*
So I've just been informed that it's only in Russia you can have a pet bear. NO, No you can't has pet bear Chris. ...Suck

Is this not AWESOME?

May 14, 2009

Zombies? What Zombies?

I don't think I'm ever going to need another gun for as long as I live. Which will be a long time with this one.

It's called the Auto Assault-12(AA-12), it can fire up to 300 rounds per minute without recoil. WTH?! Well, the next time those darn kids get on Farmer John's property, it's on!

Here's the awesomness in action:

Oh, and just in case you wanted to mount it on top of your car, you can do that too.

Is this not AWESOME?

May 13, 2009

Metal Claws and Badassery

If you haven't seen the new wolverine movie yet, don't be sad. I've got you covered right here.

Sitting next to me in the theater was the equivalent of the Simpson's Fat Comic Book Guy. He was determined to let the entire theater know the "true facts" about Wolverine and his powers. I think my favorite part was during the Wolverine and Hot Chick love scene. The guy shouted out, "Oh man this is so gay!" Then immediately someone from the theater shouted back, "No, it's actually quite hetero!" I love going to the movies.

Is this not AWESOME?

May 12, 2009

Entrance Fee

This is what's posted on the outside of my office door. I've had less visitors since then.

Is this not AWESOME?

May 11, 2009

A Guide To All Things In Life

Shoryuken is the end all be all answer to every question you've ever had. Go ahead and test it, you won't find a better answer.

Is this not AWESOME?

May 8, 2009

Death Metal Pets

There's something about animals.

Many of you know that I'm obsessed with animals. Not because they make good companions, or are helpful, or whatever else. It's because of the way they look. I mean just look at them! Why in the world do they look like that? What is going on in their mind? Like these two punks here...

They are camels and they are in a car. Probably the only two camels in the world to ever set toe in a car. But for some reason they are pissed right off? "How dare that human get near us in a car!"

Check this out, when you add Death Metal to the mix, it's a whole new experience.

"Lift your gauntlet of ROCK!" as Jack Black would say, and bang your head to this monstrosity.

Speaking of Jack Black, I'm definitely buying this game.

Is this not AWESOME?

May 7, 2009

A Response to LOLCATS

I've been having a problem lately. But I've found the solution to my up and coming addiction.

Try JibJab Sendables® eCards today!

Thank you for clearing that up. I can rest easier now knowing this.

JibJab.com has been providing the internet with those videos of giant headed political leaders, dancing elves, and this...

I gave this to my Dad for his 50th Birthday.

Is this not AWESOME?

May 6, 2009

I've Always Wondered This.

One day my dad took me aside and murdered my beliefs. It was the day he told me all at once that Santa, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, and Monsters weren't *spoiler warning* "real". WTF dad!? Next you are probably going to tell me I was adopted! Well at least some people still believe in the Easter Bunny.

Is this not AWESOME?

May 5, 2009

Old School for New School

How many times have you died while playing an NES emulator because you pressed the wrong button on the keyboard? Yeah, same, I always forget what key is assigned to the jump button.

I worry no more

The Retro NES USB Controller is perfect for creating old school gaming nostalgia on your computer. The standard NES plug has been replaced with newfangled USB. Hey, we wouldn't recommend it for FPS shooters but it's ideal for MAME and NES emulators. - Think Geek

You can pick up this sexy piece of plastic here for about $30.

Is this not AWESOME?

May 4, 2009

School Teachers Could Be So Much More Effect

I can remember my 11th and 12th grade English classes were torture because of the required books I had to read. Of coarse I didn't fully understand the power of these books as I was way more interested in female anatomy and games played with a video screen. But teachers, there is a way to get kids interested in reading these books. It's all about the cover art!

Usually I will pick up a book and read the back cover first to see if it sounds interesting. No need to do that with these covers! Already I can tell these are instant classics.

You can find more of them here and a whole lot of other awfully awesome stuff at Somethingawful.com

Is this not AWESOME?