Showing posts with label Instructions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Instructions. Show all posts

Aug 24, 2009

Requirements For All Books

All books and anything readable should have these simple instructions.

Oh, no wonder I broke my legs, it's not a parachute at all!?

Reading has never been a strong passion of mine. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate and recognize it's importance and I know I would benefit greatly from reading, but really, I'd rather just do something else. It's pretty much been that way my whole life. Which is why this story I'm about to tell is funny.

One day I was at my friend's mother in law's house playing video games. We had probably just finished Free Bird on expert or shot a zombie in the head, because he killed our parents, I don't honestly remember but it's really not important. What's important is that while my friend was taking a turn, I looked at the coffee table and saw something that sent a flood of nostalgia out my mouth, "I LOVE THIS BOOK!" I exclaimed.
Stunned, my friend stopped playing because those mere words alone out of my mouth were enough to shock and maybe cause a little vomit from surprise. He turned around thinking, "WHAT! Chris loves a book!?"
There he saw me sitting in the easy chair holding "The Eleventh Hour". For those of you who don't know, it's a picture book.
Relieved the world hadn't ended, my friend continue blasting zombies, aliens, monsters, or whatever. True Story.

Is this not AWESOME?

Jun 22, 2009

Informative Instructions

Life doesn't come with instructions, but lucky for us there real American heroes out there who know what they are talking about and are willing to share their gold mines of information with us. For example, babies.

Make sure this song is playing while you read all the instructions. There will be test, both written and physical.

Is this not AWESOME?